Look. It isn’t like the unique Highway Home was some untouchable relic. The 1989 Patrick Swayze car was a attractive, violent drama with a plot that was as clumsy as its main man was devastatingly scorching. It should not be unattainable to remake it into one thing freshly enjoyable. However my god do director Doug Liman and main man Jake Gyllenhaal make it look troublesome. 

Premiering at SXSW 2024’s opening night time forward of its debut on Prime Video, Highway Home re-imagines the story of a cool-as-a-cucumber but able to throat-ripping bouncer James Dalton for a brand new age and a brand new locale. And whereas screenwriters Anothony Bagarozzi and Charles Mondry ditched dusty and dilapidated Missouri for a tropical island within the Florida Keys, this remake lacks the warmth of the unique. 

Highway Home is now a couple of disgraced UFC fighter. 

Jake Gyllenhaal and Conor McGregor in “Highway Home.”
Credit score: Amazon MGM Studios

Gyllenhaal stars as Elwood Dalton, a former UFC middleweight working from a grim incident that ended his profession and made him infamous. On a imprecise mission of self-imposed penance, he now bangs round in a beater automobile in search of shady boxing occasions to make some fast money. His energy to intimidate via fame alone (although the muscle groups on show when he is topless do not harm) attracts the eye of Frankie (Jessica Williams), who owns a highway home referred to as “The Highway Home” that is being terrorized by a biker gang. She provides Dalton $20k for a month of beating again the dangerous guys, and he reluctantly accepts. 

Rolling into Glass Key, he swiftly befriends an adolescent bookworm referred to as Charlie (Hannah Lanier), a plucky bartender named Laurel (the charismatic B.Okay. Cannon), and the bruised and scrawny (by comparability) bouncer Billy (Euphoria‘s Lukas Gage). Slapping the shit out of the biker gang isn’t any drawback for Dalton — and makes for a comically enjoyable sequence as robust guys get reduce all the way down to measurement like grade college bullies. However quickly he realizes that there is a greater foe to combat: native actual property tycoon Ben Brandt (Billy Magnussen doing probably the most with a lazily written villain function). You already know Brandt is unhinged as a result of he calls for to be shaved by a barber with a straight razor whereas on a yacht racing via uneven waters. Why? I do not know man, he is so excessive or satisfied every little thing will go his manner or one thing. 

Because the native police pressure has been corrupted by Brandt and his offscreen legal father (who looks as if he’d be a much bigger plot level after which simply isn‘t), it is as much as Dalton to not solely clear up the Highway Home however save Glass Key from those that would gentrify it via pressure. Additionally he falls in love with a neighborhood physician (a moody Daniela Melchior), who chides him about his violent methods, as a result of Highway Home.  

Straight to streaming was the precise selection for Highway Home. 

Daniela Melchior in “Highway Home.”
Credit score: Amazon MGM Studios

Director Doug Liman made headlines when he proclaimed he’d boycott the movie’s world premiere over Amazon MGM Studos’ determination to skip a theatrical launch and go straight to streaming. (He did in reality attend.) As Liman has seen success with motion hits like The Bourne Identification and Mr. & Mrs. Smith and the critically heralded Fringe of Tomorrow, this initially appeared a blunder by the distributor. However now having seen Highway Home, I get it. 

Positive, the unique Highway Home had as convoluted a plotline. However because it was hardly its most praised asset. (That’d be Sam Elliott’s superb ponytail, most likely.) So it is weird that Bagarozzi and Mondry so completely retread that territory, particularly as their model lacks a satisfying variety of combat scenes. Or possibly it is simply that the combat scenes themselves will not be satisfying. Contemplating Liman’s filmography, that is frankly surprising. However there’s an off-putting disconnect between the movie’s motion aesthetic and its content material. 

It is a film a couple of man who would not like weapons or knives, and favors his fists for beating the hell out of any takers. It is a uncooked, primal violence that performed properly within the ’80s period of machismo and massive hair. However such bravado could be frowned upon at the moment with out some tweaks. So this Dalton extolls detailed data in regards to the injury he is carried out, exhibiting a self-awareness and even a sort streak as he drives his victims to the hospital. (Shout out to comedic actor Arturo Castro, who makes probably the most of each beat and beating, stealing scenes along with his wide-eyed naïveté.) 

Enjoyable slapping apart, Highway Home‘s fight is basically underwhelming in its staging. To reinforce the affect of blows, Liman depends on whip-pans supposed to inject momentum into motion and pace ramps that basically pace up the edit of a punch to make it look quicker. The consequence although is a film that’s actually flashier than the unique however seems clearly manipulated, which detracts from the gritty fantasy of 1 man towards the world. 

Liman additionally provides in to fashionable motion calls for of extra extra extra. So the violence swiftly strikes from slapping to bone-snapping, to arson, explosions, and a ship chase that certain is lengthy, although not enthralling. It turns into simply one other motion film. In a packed theater, a few of these moments earned cheers from the enthusiastic opening night time crowd. Others have been met with boring silence. Maybe as a result of the pacing between plot, motion, and comedy ranges from off-balance to inexplicable, or possibly as a result of Gyllenhaal shouldn’t be touchdown the beats of this function. 

Jake Gyllenhaal isn’t any Patrick Swayze. 

Jake Gyllenhaal and Lukas Gage in “Highway Home.”
Credit score: Amazon MGM Studios

Within the unique Highway Home as iconic because the throat rip that echoes throughout a long time of motion motion pictures was Swayze’s perspective. A cool rebel towards glowering motion heroes, Dalton was nearly breezy when he wasn’t punching dudes out. “I believed you would be greater,” some would possibly sneer, as a result of he wasn’t as immediately intimidating as his fame would recommend. However the specter of his violence was enhanced by how calm he was earlier than the storm. “Be good” was not a request, it was a risk. 

Gyllenhaal can not replicate this zen-like calm, so the steadiness is misplaced. He lacquers on a crooked grin and sips espresso coolly as issues start to get rowdy. However he exudes a excessive power onscreen that reads both as anxious (Zodiac), smug (Velvet Buzzsaw, Spider-Man: Far From Residence), manic (Okja), or tightly wound (Nightcrawler). So, we as an viewers can not luxuriate within the vicarious pleasure of feeling calm within the face of bar brawl chaos. As an alternative, we are able to sense the strain beneath this Dalton’s skinny veneer of chill. Not solely does it bleed out the enjoyable of mindless violence, but additionally it telegraphs the reveal of what Dalton did, which is predictable sufficient and tediously repeatedly. 

This Highway Home lacks balls. 

Jake Gyllenhaal and Billy Magnussen in “Highway Home.”
Credit score: Amazon MGM Studios

There may be violence and a few surprising showdowns in Liman’s model. However the movie’s dedication to conserving Dalton an excellent man makes for some deeply silly storytelling decisions. There will likely be no throat rip, however a flashy pace boat chase scene, and an alligator assault that appears as scary as a beer-bellied dad splashing round an above floor swimming pool. The sweat and dust and animal magnetism of the unique is changed with gloss and sunshine and an precise animal. 

So the motion is underwhelming. However how’s the intercourse enchantment? To Liman’s credit score, he pulls a Michael Bay, capturing Gyllenhaal from a low angle that makes him tower in body, his ripped torso glistening beneath the solar or confoundingly brilliant bar lighting. The main man is horny. His romantic lead is gorgeous. They’ve one single kiss that is titillating. And that is it. Has the web discourse over an excessive amount of intercourse in cinema contaminated the Highway Home remake? Or is it simply this tame of its personal accord? Both manner, the riskiest transfer this film makes is casting Conor McGregor as an eccentric goon. 

The Irish MMA fighter makes his on-screen performing debut in Highway Home. (He lent his voice to the online game Name of Responsibility: Infinite Struggle in 2016). And out of doors of his lack of expertise, contemplating McGregor has so many controversies that his wiki web page has an entire part devoted to them, it is an eyebrow-raising casting selection. To his credit score, the pro-fighter storms onto display screen with main charisma and a bare-ass, wreaking havoc in a bustling market whereas taking a cellphone name. It is a second so outrageous that it has Quick X Jason Momoa vibes. However in each scene after, McGregor proves one-note. His character is a caricature of a brash and boisterous robust man. He strides round along with his arms arched vast like Popeye. His face is caught in a perpetual threatening grin…truly additionally like Popeye. Like Magnussen, he’s perpetually keyed up, giving the character nowhere to go. And so even this cruel mercenary turns into a little bit of a bore. It is a stunt casting ploy that does not play. 

On the technical finish, there are bewildering decisions as properly. The colour appropriate is inconsistent, with Dalton wanting like a tanned god in some scenes and a washed out man on the point of collapse in others. The sound design is confounding, as a lot of the movie takes place exterior or in open-air venues, but all of it sounds prefer it was recorded on a stage. Wind, birds, and life do not appear to exist right here, simply the canned audio — a few of which can have been created by AI. One of the best factor in regards to the audio on this Highway Home is the array of musical performances, which vary from rock to zydeco to alt-pop, however all bop. In these, there’s an power that feels grounded and engaging. However elsewhere, this remake is leaning on drained motion cliches (harmless child wants defending, pouting however good love curiosity, requisite chase scene, idiotic post-cred scene) with out making a mark of its personal. 

Ultimately, Highway Home is a wreck. Whereas there are sufficient goodies to make for a compelling trailer, Liman and firm fail to ship a remake value streaming, a lot much less a theatrical launch. 

Highway Home was reviewed out the world premiere at SXSW 2024; the movie will hit Prime Video on March 21.